I'm so concerned with not sending mixed signals that I end up giving off the wrong impression. Why must my brain be programmed to say whatever is the most socially awkward thing to say, unless I'm yelling/raging?

Take today for instance, Blayn, being the troll that he is, RANDOMLY asked me if I liked Greg. My first thought went to friendship wise, but then I realized that's not what he was asking, so I paused for a brief second, which made Blayn flip out. For the REST OF THE NIGHT, Blayn kept being like, "so... Jessica..." because he got the wrong idea.

I have a headache from spending time with Blayn. Not necessarily from Greg, because Greg isn't constantly yelling or saying stupid things like Blayn is. I thought I hated Watson, but there's NO comparison between Blayn and him. I like spending time with Blayn there as well, but after not talking to him or seeing him for awhile and then spending HOURS with him, I start to want to kill myself. I was legitimately yell arguing with Blayn because he won't listen. His girlfriend must be a saint, because I punched Blayn legitimately more than 20 times today.

I think Greg still likes me too.. or maybe that's just how Greg is. When I first saw Greg, he said that I seemed to have gotten shorter and then when I saw Blayn, he said I seemed to have gotten taller. Unlike Blayn, Greg tends to not look at me when I'm talking.. then again I'm not always comfortable with constant eye contact, but my chest can't talk. And Greg wants to hang out again and it was fun, but I don't want to send the wrong idea, which Blayn already has, because he kept being an IDIOT.

This is why I can't hang out with other people besides Ashley & Watson, because people don't understand.

Blayn kept shipping me with EVERYONE. He shipped me with Greg, with Chris (who we met up with at McDonald's & it was awkward because Blayn told Chris to ask me out and I'm just PAST the point of even by then), and also with Watson, because THAT is completely plausible.

I think Blayn does this to be a troll, and it works, because of my headache, my whole body hurting from just general annoyance, and my brain hurting from worrying over whether or not he's going to lovetap my car and take its virginity, which Blayn swears to do before the semester is over.

I just want Misty to be safe and untainted and I want to be able to speak without having to over-analyze everything!