As I sat in the cafeteria wallowing in self pity because I was once again at the wrong place at the wrong time and heard something I would have been better off without hearing because my kind constitution can't fathom unwarranted dislike, especially when finding out someone dislikes me or at least doesn't respect me and it's like, "where did that come from?", I ate a fortune cookie.
That sentence makes no sense, but let's go with it.
I opened my fortune cookie, eating only 1/2 of it, and noticed that my Chinese word was gooseberry, and I never know if the words in the parenthesis are how to say it or how it's spelled. My fortune said, "I would rather attempt something great and fail than attempt to do nothing and succeed."
Granted, it's more of an aphorism than a fortune, but it's still difficult to actually think like that. I personally would much rather attempt at nothing, especially in the situation I was in, because I'm really hurt by everything because I actually tried on someone who wasn't reciprocating it, or at least that's how I saw it. I'm too nice of a person to confront them about it ever, although I really want to and wish all sorts of negative things down on them (jokingly mostly).
But I do agree with the statement. Cue Jessica's hypocrisy time. As much as I hate how painful this experience is, that is exactly what this is: an experience. I'm going to end up getting burned by people I wouldn't expect to be hurt by, and maybe this is a precursor to better prepare myself next time. Although, I'm pretty sure that's not the message I'm supposed to get from this, I'm notoriously known for learning the wrong lesson. I can only hope that it works out in the future, and I guess that's all I can really hope for at this point, because I'm kind of done trying on a lost cause =/
"The meeting of two personalities is like the contact of two chemical substances: if there is any reaction, both are transformed." (Carl Jung)
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